I have preferences.
You have preferences.
The people we lead and serve have preferences.
That is not good or bad, it just is.
But often we don’t realize how significantly our preferences shape what we desire until something doesn’t go the way of our, well, preferences.
Whether it is over song, style, volume, liturgy, or aesthetic, how might we avoid starting another ‘worship war’ in our own churches? Here are a few things to consider:
Acknowledge that we all have preferences. You, me, our team, our church, our leaders - we can celebrate, honor, and acknowledge without being dismissive or condescending towards those preferences which are different.
Realize that no one is neutral. All of us have been shaped in our lives and faith by countless influences - these are places of deep memory and impact.
Develop a philosophy of worship. Our corporate gatherings matter, and we should take seriously the songs we sing and the way our gatherings form our people. That is why I want every aspect of the gathering to be intentionally shaped. But an unexpected benefit of intentionality is that it allows us to articulate a deeper truth to our people if/when there is pushback. Why do we do the things that we do? Our own leadership will be easily swayed if there isn’t something of significance anchoring the decisions we make on and off the platform.
Use preferences as an opportunity to fight for greater unity. We can consider one another more highly than we consider ourselves when we choose to die to our preferences, for the sake of a brother or sisters preference.
Identify my own preferences. More than just acknowledging that preferences exist - what are my preferences? If I was the only person I needed to consider, how would that shape the liturgy and flow of a service I built? How would it impact the style of songs - and the specific songs I choose? What elements would I include weekly? This is an exercise I need to do regularly so that I am able to disentangle my preferences from Gospel. To help me appreciate that I am a servant to the Lord and His people in a specific context, at a specific place in time. My job is not to make little versions of myself - to enforce my own preferences on a people. My job is not to make people more like themselves - to allow their preferences to dictate all that we do. No, my job is to help create a space where people can become more like Jesus.
What would you add?